Proverbs 19:18, Costly Over-Indulgence

December 15, Proverbs 19:18

Psalm 89:31-33 “Seeming harshness more merciful than false tenderness.”

Costly Over-Indulgence

Many educational experts now assert that swatting or spanking children is never good discipline. (“Toronto Star”). Another front-page headline in the same paper one year later reads, “Make spanking illegal.” Spanking makes children more likely to disobey, and unspanked children behave better than spanked ones, according to their studies. This group aims to repeal the Criminal Code which “exempts parents from assault charges even if they use reasonable force in correcting their child.” What do these “experts” know that Solomon or God’s infallible Word doesn’t know? Godly Bishop Ryle (1816-1900), commenting on this topic, said, “I only beg to enter my decided protest against the modern notion that no child ought ever to be whipped.” Apparently the “modern” notion has been around quite a long time! Today’s proverb is to be ruled, by our modern standards, not only “illegal,” but in violation of “the human rights of children.”

1. An Examination of the Text: Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying (vs.18). The first half of the text gives no textual difficulty. Chasten means to correct, to discipline. The second half has been read in two different ways. The AV reads too strongly for many modern ears, but the Hebrew wording is very strong indeed. Literally it says, “and set not thy soul (heart) on causing him to die.” Either this means, “Let not your passion or excessive correction kill him, be moved to slay him.” This is the thought conveyed by most modern versions. In other words, don’t beat him to death. Or it may mean, let not foolish indulgence, because of his crying, cause him to die (AV margin); that is, “to leave him undisciplined may well lead to his own death, ruining himself!” Even the Living Bible took this approach. It reads, in the second part, “If you don’t you will ruin his life.” This, we think, is the message of the Hebrew and of the KJV, let not thy soul spare for his crying. “The alternative to discipline is disaster” (Havner).

2. An Exposition of its Teaching: Simply put, this text would encourage proper discipline, strong, consistent, loving discipline. Either too much beating or too little can kill children. Derek Kidner titles this the “deadly leniency.” Clearly the warning is that you can kill them with too much correction, or they can kill themselves from too little! Yet, for the incorrigible child there is hope for his future in continued chastening. Note the vital word while. Don’t wait till the child is “beyond hope,” as did David (1 Kg. 1:5-6), and many others since! The period for effective correction is very brief. Young people, like soft wax, soon take an impression. Well does the Jesuit know, “Give me a boy till he’s seven, and I don’t care who has him after that.” Woe to the parent who misses that little while to discipline the child for his soul’s good and for God!

“Ere your boy has reachéd seven,
Teach him well the way to Heaven”

Thought: “A hard way to wisdom is better than an soft way to death.”

Prayer: Oh! for more godly Wisdom in correcting our children.